Tag: obsessions

Losing Weight

Posted by: Deborah Talalay Posted on: 15/08/2011 , , , ,

What we lose is what we must try to find again

Saying we are losing weight is really sending the wrong message to the brain. Because what we lose is what we must make every effort to find again. Perhaps that’s why so many of us are on the roller coaster of weight loss followed by instant and rapid weight gain.

Slimming becomes much more difficult as you get older. The metabolism slows down, and all the treats, snacks and alcohol just go straight to the waistline and the hips. If you’ve ever played Monopoly

– do not pass go

– do not collect your £200

Just go straight to the hips!

One of the problems of ageing is that the digestive system has taken a battering over the years. The liver may not be functioning properly and you may have low level diabetes, both of which will make it harder to shed weight. If the body has developed intolerance to certain foods, it won’t know how to deal with this and will just store these foods as fat.

Then there’s the Thyroid gland which is often out of balance or which under reacts the older we get. The Thyroid is responsible for a great many of the functions of our bodies, including the regulation of weight. If the Thyroid is sluggish shedding weight becomes very difficult.

Then there’s the mindset which needs to be tackled before even beginning on any sort of diet.

This includes

  • the compulsion to reward ourselves with food
  • the knowledge that an emotional pain can be temporarily eased by eating sweets, pastries, chocolate.
  • and, of course, the knowledge that drinking alcohol will not only ease the pain – but will make us temporarily forget.

There are also the beliefs of scarcity – that there is not enough and that you have to eat while food is available. When I was growing up, we were all told that we must not waste food and must finish off everything on our plates because of the poor starving children in Biafra or in China. Of course, if we didn’t finish our food the poor starving children would not have benefitted, and what we did was to teach ourselves to overeat.  This way of thinking was drummed into us after WW11 because food had been rationed and many foods were not available. So there was a much greater respect for food and the whole process of growing it and making it available to everyone. As someone who grew up with that – I think it is all wrong the way we waste food, especially as in many parts of the world there is not enough to eat.

My rethink on this is: – rather than finish off a large portion of food instead of wasting it, learn to take smaller portions and take more if still hungry. It’s surprising how much less is needed to satisfy the appetite.

There are so many diets available and they won’t all suit you. So when deciding which one to do – pick one with foods you like and which you think you can keep to. If you hate every minute and think of it as torture and deprivation, you will soon break the diet and probably go on a binge to make up for the disappointment.

But it is pointless to start on any diet if you haven’t prepared.

  • Exercise regularly to increase your metabolic rate and to burn off the excess fat. Once a week is not enough!
  • Cut out the foods you are sensitive or intolerant to. They can often block the process of shedding weight.
  • If you think your body doesn’t react well enough – get your liver, thyroid and sugar levels checked.
  • Take a look at some of your beliefs around eating. If your beliefs are making you put the weight right back on, consider seeing a Theta Healer who will help you to remove them and to install beliefs which will serve you better

If you would like to learn more about Theta Healing and how it can help remove beliefs which don’t serve you:-

Call me on: 07979538378

Email me at: debbie.talalay@gmail.com

Or go to my website to find out how Theta Healing and Homeopathy could help you. www.18.135.123.1

I Hate How I Look

Posted by: Deborah Talalay Posted on: 01/08/2011 , , , ,

Dysmorphia – a mental disorder characterized by distorted body image and obsessions about perceived physical shortcomings

“I feel so gross – I can’t stand how I look” said a very pretty woman.

She was carrying a lot of weight around her hips and backside – but was still very attractive.

But she didn’t see it like that.  Her prettiness meant nothing to her. She couldn’t believe it that men found her attractive. She thought they just pitied her!

Any attempt to get her to take a fresh look at herself was met with scorn and was rejected.

“In some cultures men prefer women with a big bottom” said I.

But no – I was just trying to make her feel better – and this is how it is, and her only option was to hide her bottom and herself.

What a waste! So much energy and emotion devoted to hating herself.

It would be easy to lose patience, to class her as self obsessed and let her get on with it. But that would be to dismiss the great many people who are so deeply ashamed of some part of their body or the shape of their body, that they come to reject themselves. It is a real and widespread problem and has ruined many lives, not only of the sufferers but also of their families and friends.

The body part they hate becomes the reason for all the things that don’t happen and have gone wrong in their lives. Usually – it’s held responsible for lack of confidence and lack of confidence is held responsible for most of life’s ills – failing to have a partner, never getting promoted at work,

It is useless to try to cajole or tease a person out of it. Unless that person changes how they perceive their body – nothing you say will make any difference at all. They don’t see their body as you see it. To them – their reality is like standing in front of a distorting fairground mirror. That is how they look to themselves. They’re surprised you can’t see it as they do and think that maybe you can but are too polite to tell them how they really look.

If the problem is because a woman – and it’s usually a woman – thinks she’s overweight, it can become so severe that it results in an eating disorder – bulimia (induced vomiting) maybe followed by anorexia.  I have known anorexics who were quite convinced they were grossly overweight even though they were so thin their bones stood out under the skin.

How do people get like this?

It doesn’t help that the fashion industry seems to be mainly aimed at dressing stick insects. The ultra thin shape has become the desired shape for us ordinary mortals – and unless we restrict our diets to two lettuce leaves and 40 cigarettes a day – we are bound to fail.

It doesn’t matter to the fashion industry that to be that thin you have probably deprived your body of the nutrients needed to function as a woman, that you feel faint most of the time, that you have stopped menstruating and that you are unable to conceive. Though of course if you were to conceive – it would mean putting on weight and becoming larger – so maybe that’s not a problem after all.

So we try to look like these fashion models, and when we can’t we feel like failures and start to hate ourselves for not being able to achieve the desired goal. Next thing you know you’re binge eating then vomiting.

The problem may not be weight but your dislike of a body part – such as a large nose. If you have been passed over or rejected it is easy to feel unwanted and to blame this on your big nose and the embarrassment it causes you, plus your loss of self worth because you feel so unusual and so ugly.

In reality – the ugliest people are often really successful because they have decided that they must make themselves really good at something so that their ugliness doesn’t matter. Often they are the most charming and the most fun to be with.

We have been given so many gifts and attributes which we ignore because we don’t have the thing we want. It’s like a child stamping her foot and saying if she can’t have an ice cream then she doesn’t want her dinner.

Many people decide that surgery is their only answer. And yes – surgery can help to restore your confidence – because you now look like everyone else.

But this isn’t the deep down confidence of a person being happy in their own skin.

This kind of confidence only comes by accepting who you are.

It is much easier than one would think to learn how to accept and be happy with oneself. Theta Healing can achieve this easily and effectively.

If you are considering surgery – please make sure that you also learn how to feel happy in yourself so that your transformation can be more than just skin deep.

If you would like to learn more about Theta Healing and how it can help you feel good about yourself:-

Call me on: 07979538378

Email me at: debbie.talalay@gmail.com

Or go to my website to find out how Theta Healing and Homeopathy could help you. www.18.135.123.1