Exams are looming.
How does your teenager deal with them?
Is revision put off till the last possible moment until fear and panic set in?
Does Facebook feature more prominently than textbooks?
Or does she feel she can’t possibly revise the entire syllabus – doesn’t know where to start – so doesn’t do anything?
Or like one boy I treated – who was so terrified of sitting the exams he couldn’t bring himself to think about it – and that included revision.
Has procrastination becomes a way of life?
One parent told me of the sinking feeling of despair she had when she saw her clever but unmotivated son divide his time between yet another computer game and the TV. She told me how angry and upset she was that she was paying for a first class education so he could get a start in life – and how let down she felt that he was damaging his future by throwing away his opportunities and his potential, and that he hadn’t valued or recognised the effort his parents were making to send him to his school.
In these very common scenarios no amount of cajoling or bribery make any difference and guilt trips only succeed in making them even more stubborn.
It can look like laziness, but in my experience there is no such thing as a lazy child.
What I have seen are children whose attitude and performance are clouded by negative beliefs and low expectations of themselves. There are many who believe that they are not as clever as parents or brothers and sisters – they believe they will never live up to their family’s expectations of them and can’t possibly compete with the family track record. So they decide that they won’t put anything into it, and that will mean that they haven’t failed because they didn’t even try. You can’t fail if you don’t compete in the first place.
Belief: “I am not good enough” lies beneath low expectations and poor performance.
What we are looking at is avoidance rather than laziness:
• Avoidance of failure and humiliation if they try and then fail, or if they try and the results are just mediocre.
• Avoidance of the disappointment of parents and themselves if they decide to try and then perform badly.
• Avoidance of the confirmation that they are not good enough.
Failure and fear of failure are responsible for a lot of negative attitude.
• Avoidance of being thought of as a nerd or a boffin. This one has a lot to do with the school and if it’s judged to be uncool if you’re clever.
You could lose your social status, which would be infinitely worse than failing a few exams.
The fear of being seen as too clever can make a teenager underperform
Then there’s the inability to concentrate – sometimes classified as ADHD. If your teenager comes into this category, there is plenty that can be done to not only help, but to transform the situation. Homeopathic remedies and Theta Healing are both powerful tools.
Ritalin is often prescribed by the medical profession. I personally, do not believe that Ritalin is the answer or even a temporary solution. It does not cure the underlying causes and you end up with a child living under a permanent drug regime.
I have treated teenagers for all these beliefs and problems. Some of them have been very alienated, and in these cases it has taken them longer to get them back on track. But it can be done.
It’s not the studying that’s the problem – it’s the beliefs surrounding the studying.
These can be changed.
The fastest and most effective method I have found is Theta Healing.
On my website www.deborahtalalayhealing.com. I have an explanation on Theta Healing and how it works. If you click on the page – What clients have said – you will see a message from a mother whose daughter began doing much better in her exams and with her revision after Theta Healing.
If you would like to find out more, please contact me on: 07979538 378