Huffington Post Article – Divorce

Huffington Post Article – Divorce

Even when you both agree it’s the best thing – getting divorced is a major upheaval. But more often than not the reason for the breakup involves bad behaviour and betrayal.

In my interview with Theta Healer Deborah Talalay, she reveals here the deeper effects of divorce, how they can ruin your chances of finding a new partner, and what you can do about it.

“There are some unavoidable side effects to the process of divorce:

The effects of divorce

  • The betrayal of your love and the loss of your dreams
  • The hurt to your feelings
  • The loss of your confidence and self-esteem
  • And the probability that finances are going to be a real problem

Then there are the issues around the children and access and the battle for their affections and their support. It’s not surprising that there is often such a residue of anger and bitterness.

Being single is the least of your problems

In a way – I believe that these emotions present an even greater problem to the divorcee than their new single status. These are the emotions which make you into an angry, sour and unattractive individual. Until you have worked through them – you’re unlikely to find another partner.

It’s astonishing how many people drum up the confidence to start dating again, and then spend their entire first date talking about how awful their ex was. Not a recipe for a successful match. Of course – there is never a second date.

So it’s really important to get the divorce or the breakup of your relationship out of your system first, before attempting to find a new partner.

Getting ready to date post-divorce

Use the opportunity to work on the reasons why your partnership failed, so that when you do go into a new partnership it doesn’t become a repeat of the old.

Theta Healing has helped the people I have worked with transform their feelings of hurt and betrayal, and has produced rapid and effective change.

If you would like help with a breakup and all the grief and negativity that has been released, there are free videos available to help you, which explain what Theta Healing is and how it works, as well as videos which will enable you to rapidly and effectively move away from the old and into the new.”

Getting Over Your Divorce

Getting over your divorce can be difficult

Getting over the hurt and feelings of betrayal is a major hurdle. Not to mention the effects of divorce on children…

Even with marriage counselling and divorce mediation – the results can leave you feeling angry and bitter.

It is important to work on the reasons why your partnership failed. This will help make sure you don’t repeat the same mistakes, and by making you less hurt and angry will minimise the effect of divorce on children.

Seeing a Theta Healing therapist will make getting over your divorce much easier. It can help bring you rapid relief from your negative emotions…

Read the full version on the Huffington Post http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/suzy-miller/theta-healing-how-can-tha_b_4176855.html

The Secret to Better Relationships

Invite better and closer relationships into your life

You don’t need a special issue to benefit from The Stamford Transformation Videos and you don’t need to be unhappy. In fact it’s an excellent opportunity to make your existing relationships even closer and better.

The issues and beliefs that we all have lurking just underneath the surface colour the relationships we have. Sometimes it’s like the elephant in the room – you know there’s an issue there and no one acknowledges it. It’s too dangerous. It’ll unleash too much emotion. What will the consequences be?

So we pretend it’s all fine.

But is it all fine?
Just because you’re able to function – doesn’t resolve anything.
And so the tension accumulates.
By the time it bursts – you have a major issue on your hands instead of one that could have been dealt with easily and effectively at a much earlier stage.

Often – these issues aren’t even yours.
We all carry patterning inherited from our ancestors and other sources which consciously we would be appalled at.
This patterning is something we live with whether conscious of it or not. It acts as an invisible brake on what we do and what we want to achieve.
We might have the brake on in one area of our lives and not in another.
When we clean ourselves of this patterning we enhance our actions, heal our relationships and invite extraordinary happenings into our lives.
By clearing our energy we invite wonderful people into our lives. We allow the people we’re with to be more wonderful with us – and we allow the flow of the Universe to reach us without obstacles.

So instead of letting the unspoken irritations and disappointments build up – do something about it now.
Don’t wait for the other person to change. That’s what they’re doing with you. It just builds up lots of point scoring and resentment.
Change yourself – because when you change your beliefs everyone else starts treating you differently.

Visit my website to find out more. Read how my clients’ lives have changed.
www.deborahtalalayhealing.com

The Challenge of Travelling

Healing For Change – The Challenge of Travelling

Travelling is often far more of a challenge than we’ve bargained for.
We leave our comfortable lives and homes and set off for different parts of the world. But when we’ve left the things we’re familiar with – all the things that reassure us – we often surprise ourselves by how insecure we feel. The things that wouldn’t normally trouble us begin to feel threatening.
The adventure begins to look more like an ordeal.

While you’re at home in your own environment it’s easy to forget how comfortable you are. The faces on the street are familiar; you know where to go and how to achieve what you need to do with the minimum of effort. You’ve arranged your home to suit your preferences. And unless you like to make life difficult for yourself, you organise your life so that it can be lived as smoothly and conveniently as possible.

What we do is to live in such a way that we eliminate anything that makes us uncomfortable or that challenges us.
We forget that there are certain things which do make us feel threatened or low because we no longer encounter them on a daily basis. When we ‘re travelling our safety nets have been removed, so when these things happen – we are very surprised by the intensity of our reaction.

Many people have a fear of heights.
How do you manage when you’ve been told that the excursion has easy walks and you discover that the pathway is quite narrow with a precipice on one side with only a rickety looking handrail? Do you put on a brave face? Make a scene? Hang back and wait for everyone to return?
How do you feel about yourself afterwards? A little shamefaced? A bit annoyed with yourself because you couldn’t face what everyone else was able to do quite easily. Do you worry if you can manage on the rest of the trip or that you might be a drag on everyone else?

The truth is that though we don’t have to be good at everything we often don’t realise how very limited we’ve become. As we get older our expectations of ourselves become lower and it’s not long before you begin to feel that perhaps you ought to play it safe.

If you find yourself avoiding a certain holiday because you’re uncertain how you’ll cope with some of the demands it will place on you – then perhaps now’s the time to face those anxieties and to see if they can be cleared.

There are many therapies which can help.
I practice a simple, safe yet powerful non-invasive therapy that reprograms entrenched negative belief patterns. It incorporates several healing methods into a highly effective system.
It works on our energy to identify, remove and replace limiting beliefs, whether they’re held consciously or unconsciously

Many of us have deeply held negative beliefs that drive us and stop us doing what we could despite our efforts to change. It doesn’t have to be that way. Healing for Change works quickly to clear those blocks and for many the results are instantaneous and transformative on an emotional, mental and physical level.

Once your underlying beliefs have been cleared, then you’ll find that you’re ready to conquer the world.

If you’d like to find out more about this ground breaking new therapy, please visit my website; www.deborahtalalayhealing.com

You will find free videos showing you what the healing is, how it works and how it might apply to you.

I feel deserted

Do you feel deserted?

Are you the one left behind?

Has your partner gone off with someone else?

Are they younger and better looking?

Are they wealthier?

All of this is likely to make you feel redundant and discarded. It will make you feel deserted.
It’s a real knock to your self-confidence, and how you rate yourself.
If your partner has left for these reasons – then you wonder what others must think of you.

Whatever you do – don’t hide!

Remember Princess Diana when she was stripped of her Royal title?
She looked so sad and despairing on her way back from the Palace.
But that night, she put on a glamorous evening gown and went dancing.
Instead of crying alone – she presented a brave face to the world and won a lot of admiration for her courage.

OK – just because your partner has gone does not mean you are redundant or past your sell by date. Don’t give in to those destructive thoughts.
You are worthwhile and of value. Look after yourself – don’t allow yourself to go to seed. Keep your head up!
Be kind to yourself – and no – that doesn’t mean another bar of chocolate.

You have skills and attributes which may never have been given the chance to blossom in your old relationship. Maybe it’s time for that to happen.
The Stamford Transformation videos have helped transform feelings of betrayal and worthlessness, and have produced rapid and effective change.

If you would like help with a breakup and the loss of confidence and self-esteem that has gone with it, go to my website: www.deborahtalalayhealing.com

There are free videos which explain what the Healing is and how it works, as well as videos which will enable you to rapidly and effectively move away from the old and into the new.

Help your business – Change beliefs that sabotage success

Theta Healing, is a form of energy healing that helps clear self-limiting beliefs through accessing the theta brainwaves.  Theta Healing has proven to be especially beneficial for helping business people change beliefs that sabotage their success. Theta Healing can help your business team feel better about their own lives and improve how they interact with clients and colleagues. The effects can be felt throughout the organisation leading to better staff retention, morale and productivity. Clients have found Theta Healing has;-

  • removed anxiety from their decision making
  • removed fear of ‘getting it wrong’ with resulting paralysis
  • eased anxiety over the responsibility for taking the next step in their business
  • improved relations and interaction with their colleagues
  • removed lack of confidence in their abilities and performance
  • Resulted in better sleep and more positive mood
  • Improved their health with less reliance on medication and alcohol

I diagnose and deal directly with the issues that sabotage your thinking and your life. My desire is to enable people to remove blocks and become so well physically, mentally and emotionally, that they are able to make the most of their lives and their potential. I work with people of all ages to unblock their pathways to a more successful life.  For example I help:

  • Partners in organisations – to improve performance
  • Female Executives – enable them to break through the ‘glass ceiling’
  • Financial Executives –enable them to better cope with the burden of responsibility
  • Executives transitioning within a company due to restructuring – integrating the changes needed to transition well
  • Executives – to breakdown the habit of procrastination and promote clarity in decision making
  • Redundancy – to rebuild confidence affected by redundancy and discover new pathways
  • Prosperity – to eliminate the reasons why we under perform and undervalue ourselves and remove the blocks we have to receiving what we need and what we are worth
  • Students at school and university who are not performing well – a client recently received a First Degree at university instead of the Fail she expected

If you’d like to discuss how Theta Healing could help you or your organisation, please get in touch.   Specialties: Theta Healing, Homoeopathy, Kinesiology, Neuro Linguistic Programming

Change is scary – Dealing with Change

I wanted to get you thinking about the opportunities we all have in dealing with changes in our lives.

Dealing with change – Often we put off making those changes.

Dealing with change is scary – we run away from pain and when we’re not in crisis we may find it easier to live in an uncomfortable comfort zone rather than making changes. When supported by The Stamford Transformation Process dealing with change doesn’t need to be as scary or painful as you think and then letting go of your blocks becomes really easy – and so liberating. You’ll find that your life will reflect the changes you’ve made in a very positive way. So – please don’t be afraid of continuing to heal. Don’t be afraid of being the best version of yourself you can be, and don’t be frightened that you may have to make painful changes if you allow yourself to release your blocks. You will always have the choice of leaving things as they are, but you are likely to feel a lot better about your situation after the blocks have been released.

Let me leave you with something to think about:

What is it about your situation that’s working for you that you don’t want to lose? · What needs to happen for you to start living your best life? The issues you have that prevent you moving forwards can be resolved effectively and painlessly with The Stamford Transformation videos The healing in the Transformation videos is the most powerful gift given to us that I have seen in over 25 years as a therapist.

I Hate How I Look, part two

In the light of Monday’s all party House of Commons group on Body Confidence and Jackie Ashley’s great Guardian piece http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jan/29/diet-sellers-body-confidence I thought I’d write some more about how Theta Healing can help you overcome your negative feelings towards your body. My original post on “I hate my body” is the most visited blog on my site, so I know it’s a big issue for many of you.

Body Dysmorphia is a mental disorder characterized by distorted body image and obsessions about perceived physical shortcomings.

Clients often tell me they hate how they look, they want to change their bodies, lose weight, have surgery. We all know people who are obsessed with their physical appearance, constantly berating themselves for how they look, yet the reality of how they look often bears no relation to how they perceive themselves.

Theta Healing has really helped many clients with body issues, help them overcome the issues that have led them to feel like this about themselves. Many clients feel ashamed of the way they look, but with some digging we usually discover that the beliefs that have led to their distorted body image have more to do with lack of confidence, low self esteem, low self-worth, feeling ashamed, childhood issues and more that have been projected onto feelings about how they look because it’s easier to hate your nose and blame that part of yourself for all the things that have gone wrong in your life than it is to deal with often painful emotional issues.
So many people who are so deeply ashamed of some part of their body or the shape of their body, that they come to reject themselves. It is a real and widespread problem and has ruined many lives, not only of the sufferers but also of their families and friends.
The body part they hate becomes the reason for all the things that don’t happen and have gone wrong in their lives. Usually – it’s held responsible for lack of confidence and lack of confidence is held responsible for most of life’s ills – failing to have a partner, never getting promoted at work and more.

Theta has helped many clients learn to love and accept themselves, see themselves for who they are and become confident, happy and positive about the way they look and their lives. I’ve seen amazing things happen to clients once we’ve cleared up the issues surrounding their distorted body image.
We have been given so many gifts and attributes which we ignore because we don’t have the thing we want. It’s like a child stamping her foot and saying if she can’t have an ice cream then she doesn’t want her dinner.
With Theta Healing it is much easier than one would think to learn how to accept and be happy with oneself.
If you would like to learn more about Theta Healing and how it can help you feel good about yourself:-

If you would like to learn more about Theta Healing and how it can help you
Call me on: 07979538378
Email me at: debbie.talalay@gmail.com
Or go to my website to find out how Theta Healing and Homeopathy could help you.www.deborahtalalayhealing.com

How your beliefs about money affect how much money you have

Our lives reflect our belief systems.
If we take just one example – our relationship to wealth – we will usually
find many negative beliefs. For example – that wealthy people are selfish or
insensitive to others needs. That wealth is somehow wrong and that we will
be tainted by it. The list goes on! But if we think like that – imagine how
difficult it is to attract wealth – because what you are actually saying in
your energy field is that wealth is bad for you.

So the universe honours your wishes and you never become wealthy.

Theta healing helps people remove their unconscious beliefs safely, easily
and very rapidly.

When this happens life reflects your more positive thinking back to you. And
your circumstances and relationships improve.

Don’t Turn Your Breakup Into A Battlefield

Breaking up is never easy, even if you are the one that wants to end the relationship. It can be a time of deep emotional pain, conflicting emotions and whether you initiated the break up or not both partners will go through some sort of grieving process. For some it may take years to get over, but it doesn’t have to be that way and neither does it have to be a period of fighting, pain and emotional turmoil as you and your partner negotiate the tricky and painful process of separating your lives and moving on. .

With the right help, advice and guidance, breaking up can handled healthily and civilly and it doesn’t necessarily need to take years to recover from the pain, rejection and sadness that inevitably accompanies a broken heart and the end of a relationship. That’s not to say it won’t hurt but many common mistakes, emotional minefields and unnecessary financial hardships can be avoided if you consciously choose to not fall into the trap of turning your break-up into a battlefield. You have a choice when a relationship ends, you can let it define your life and sink into a morass of anger, bitterness, victim hood and sadness or you can resolve to work to get over the pain of the break up and move on to a happier and healthier life.

Theta healing can help eliminate beliefs you may have that block your ability to process painful emotions that will inevitably come up through this difficult stage. A course of Theta Healing can help you move towards a new life more easily and with less pain, help your regain your confidence, understand what went wrong, help your children make the transition without dragging them into the break-up and causing them any more trauma than they need to endure. It can help you understand why you chose that particular partner in the first place and to face the future with hope and the confidence that your next romantic relationship will be successful and lead to happiness.

Despite most people saying they are determined to make their separation as amicable as possible, even when both want the relationship to end, the dissolution of a relationship can and often does quickly disintegrate into a battlefield. How you handle the break up will impact everyone around you, especially your ex-partner and your children if you have them.

It can be terrifying when a relationship ends and people often lash out and attack, often using the children as weapons to attack their partners, especially if they feel they are the wronged party. This can be especially damaging to the children and can have a life-long impact.

One of the biggest mistakes couples make when divorcing, is to immediately consult a lawyer. A period of emotional cooling off is advisable before you start negotiating about who takes the dog, and who keeps the DVD collection. Lawyers are quick to jump in and oftentimes create unnecessary conflict between a divorcing couple. Yet in many cases where divorce is inevitable, much of the separation can be handled by the couple themselves without incurring extortionate legal fees or stress. Divorce is the separation of assets and the negotiation of a new contract (the decree absolute). Ultimately, if a couple can’t come to an agreement between themselves, they will will make the painful process more difficult for themselves and increase their suffering. They will incur unnecessary legal bills, emotional stress and a allow a judge to decide their future. Where children are involved it could mean that the children suffer in unnecessary custody battles.

If a couple can separate the emotions from the actual divorce itself the worst and most common battles can be avoided and costs can be kept to a minimum. One of the most important things to understand is that a lawyer is not your therapist. A Lawyer and a therapist will both keep tissues in their office but do you really want to pay £300-£600 an hour to cry to someone who is not a trained emotional counselor or therapist? Use a lawyer on the most necessary parts of the negotiation but if you are sensible a Decree Absolute can be obtained online at minimal cost. It may be more worthwhile to consult an accountant or financial adviser than a lawyer when sorting out the financial settlement.

There is often a terrible feeling of failure that the relationship has turned sour, that you haven’t been able to make it work, or that you chose badly in the first place. Sometimes, in order to make us feel better about ourselves we blame the other and then make ourselves the victim and ultimately become bitter, which keeps us stuck in a place of anger and resentment. This is no way to go forward in life. If your whole life is driven by hatred, resentment and anger towards your ex partner, the person that will suffer the most is ultimately you
Hatred and bitterness are extremely unattractive traits and will eventually drive away even the most sympathetic and supportive friends and family members and you and your children will suffer, often for years and always unnecessarily. Hatred and bitterness can also ultimately damage you physically and emotionally, it shows in your face, in your body language in the language you choose, your life will begin to reflect the anger and bitterness you feel. The best thing you can do for is determine to move on and build a new life for yourself.
It is rare for someone to be able to get over the end of a long term relationship without some sort of professional help, and Theta healing can often help you move much faster than conventional therapies.

How Theta Healing Can Help

The reality is that we often choose our partners for unconscious reasons. Often we are driven by unconscious beliefs that we don’t even know we have on a conscious level. Theta healing can help you reveal and discover the beliefs that led you to choose the partner you did, or why you keep choosing the same type of person and always replay the same relationships over and over again. Until we understand what drives us and why we are attracted to people who are not good for us then we are doomed to repeat the same patterns. Theta healing can help uncover, release and reprogram our beliefs and patterns, which can help us let go of our past so we won’t be doomed to choose the same type of partner next time.

Theta Healing can help us accept the end of the relationship, let go of emotional attachments and ties to our ex-partner, help us regain our confidence and self-belief and get over the painful emotions and avoid the common pitfalls and traps that people succumb to when getting divorced or ending long term relationships. Theta can help us move on and release the hatred and bitterness. It can help us feel strong and confident about the future, treat ourselves and our ex with civility and respect and the understanding that not every relationship is meant to last forever and that everyone, especially you and even your ex, is entitled to live a life filled with joy, love and happiness.
If you would like to learn more about Theta Healing and how it can help you get through your breakup Call me on: 07979538378
E-mail me at: debbie.talalay@btinternet.com Or go to my website to find out how Theta Healing could help you. www.thetahealingvideos.com